Okay, I know that most people, upon receiving one of our holiday letters, dive for the “delete” button. And then proceed directly to the “spam block” button. And then consult the authorities. But I’m hoping that some troubled soul out there actually keeps the stupid things. Specifically, the 2003 entry. I fear it is lost. Imagine a world that will have to do without whatever head cheese jokes I came up with then, or that will never know what I decided to name the twins that year. It’s really too sad to comtemplate. So if you happen to have that one, please send it along to me. You will have my eternal gratitude, and little else.

As another year draws to a close, ever steepening the slope that tilts directly into the grave, most if not all of the Thompson bunch have decided to take a break from contemplating the slowly healing scars on their wrists to wish all their friends the happiest of holidays.

(more…)

So many of our dear friends (“so many” being defined here as “fewer than one”) have requested that we fill you in on our activities of the past year (or “Tweltmont” as they call it in some foreign country I recently read about) that we have decided to accede to your demands and come out peacefully, our hands over our heads. Actually we haven’t received requests so much as blackmail and threats, accompanied by dark hints of bloody violence. But either way, we’re happy to fill you in on the highlights of what we jocularly call our “lives.”

(more…)